Saturday, June 18, 2011
There are many theories about what makes the perfect BDSM relationship.
This blog is dedicated to exploring the relationship between me and my slave, Sophia Anne.
Sophia is not my first slave, but I intend that she will be my last.
She is the first I have ever sought a permanent 24/7 relationship with, and I expect to eventually marry her, making her my first slave wife.
Of course, before then I will have the opportunity to train her and perfect her ability to serve me as I choose, thus proving her worth and earning her the right to wear a ring on her finger to compliment the ones on her nipples and clit.
Sophia is the perfect woman for me. To paraphrase an old Victorian saying, she is a lady in the drawing room and a whore in the boudoir.
She is totally submissive to me, but more importantly, she loves being submissive, rather than merely being accepting of it.
So far she has passed all of my tests and met my challenges, albeit not without disciplinary measures on several of them, especially the ones which had to do with bodily privacy.
I have broken her of the conceit that she is entitled to any privacy where her body is concerned and she now realizes that I own it and it is mine to do with as I wish.
I would like to explain my philosophy of discipline for my slave and invite your comments.
First, Master's word is LAW. A command is to be obeyed cheerfully, diligently and immediately, or in a timely manner if that is not possible.
My slave always has the opportunity to point out a problem with her being able to carry out my orders, if she feels that she cannot for some reason. I will then consider her plea. At that point, if I agree, I may relent on my order. However, if I feel her objection is merit-less, I will order her to carry out my order regardless of her objection. Further pleas are met with immediate punishment for abusing her privilege to object and she is then expected to obey.
Should she fail to obey, or should her performance be unsatisfactory my slave is ALWAYS punished. This is an inviolable rule. Performance or punishment. In this way my slave learns that Master MUST be obeyed and that it is useless to make excuses or to attempt to play on his sympathy. I have none.
That is not to say that should my slave not complete her duties that I will not allow for extraordinary circumstances. However, allowing for them will at best mitigate her punishment somewhat. I do not give orders which I don't believe can be followed, so while there might be an explanation why her performance is unsatisfactory, there is NO EXCUSE for failing to do so.
Punishment is the inevitable result. However, punishment is an opportunity for my slave to redeem herself for her failure. To me, administering punishment is an act of love, which reinforces my slave's conviction that I must be obeyed and is her chance to learn from that failure and resolve to do better in the future.
At the end of her punishment the protocol is for her to thank me for correcting her for whatever her shortcoming, and a pledge to obey in the future. She must then attempt the task again, and if need be as many times, with as many punishments as necessary to finally do as I command.
She knows that she will never escape the need to perform her task and also that the punishment will escalate with each failure to please me until she does.
However, with each punishment, she demonstrates her willingness to accept not only my punishment, but also her desire to improve as a slave and to obey me in the future.
Thus, she always earns a clean slate for the future and there can be no carryover of anger at her for failure to please me, because she has substituted her suffering for her performance.
As a result I can afford to be infinitely patient with her, while always knowing that she will ultimately do as I command her. In this way we turn a negative experience into a positive one which reinforces her obedience and gives her a sense of pride for taking responsibility and pain for her actions.
My ultimate goal is instant, enthusiastic and diligent obedience for any order I give, regardless of how distasteful or daunting it might appear to her at first.
She knows and expects that I will continue to test her and to push her limits so she can grow both as a person and a slave. She also knows that I will never give her an order which will cause her harm, although she may be required to endure pain, humiliation or some other type of discomfort or denial. Her training will never end.
Above all, though, my slave knows that no punishment will ever be meted out from anger. All punishment is calculated to accomplish one of two things, either obedience or sexual stimulation.
Obviously I have been talking about punishment for obedience reinforcement here. But the goal is the making of a better slave by correcting behavior which would undermine the relationship if allowed to continue. As such that punishment is necessary and is given in the spirit of love for my slave, since I wouldn't want anything to compromise our relationship and I know that my slave is happiest when she feels totally dominated. As I see it, it would be cruel NOT to punish her for inadequate performance.
At least that is how I see it. How do you discipline your slaves?